"I lost my temper, but when I made you come back to therapy, I was trying to help you, not hurt you. The only time I actually aimed for pain was on the deck to shock you into talking to me. In therapy I wanted to move you out of the place of pain you were in by moving through it. But I wasn't... removed enough to be effective. I messed it up. There's nothing I've done in my entire life that I regret more than that but I understand that doesn't erase it."
no subject
"I lost my temper, but when I made you come back to therapy, I was trying to help you, not hurt you. The only time I actually aimed for pain was on the deck to shock you into talking to me. In therapy I wanted to move you out of the place of pain you were in by moving through it. But I wasn't... removed enough to be effective. I messed it up. There's nothing I've done in my entire life that I regret more than that but I understand that doesn't erase it."